I’m not gonna lie to you: I could eat my own weight in hot wings. I will eat just about anything if it’s doused in wing sauce. Fake chicken nuggets. Real chicken nuggets. Fries. Chips. Sandwiches. Whatever. I have been known, on occasion, to drink Louisiana hot sauce straight from the bottle.
I had a craving for wing sauce a few weeks ago, but I didn’t have any wings. Or sauce, for that matter. But I had TVP, potatoes, hot sauce, and butter, so I did the only thing I could be expected to do under the circumstances: I made fake-wing-stuffed baked potatoes.
Start by baking a couple of potatoes. You can do them in the microwave, but they taste better in the oven, especially if you smear the skins with olive oil, sprinkle them with a little sea salt, and wrap them in aluminum foil, shiny-side-in, so the skins get nice and crispy and browned.
Melt half a stick of margarine (this is butter, which isn’t vegan, but it was all I had on hand, so let’s just pretend it’s margarine, which will work just as well) and add a quarter-cup of Louisiana-style hot sauce. Other types of hot sauce also work, but to get the traditional Buffalo wing flavor, you need a cayenne-based hot sauce.
Stir until well blended and simmer over low heat while you do the next step.
Microwave a small vegetable bouillon cube with equal parts textured vegetable protein and water (I think I used about 3/4 c. of each) until the TVP absorbs all the water. Stir the reconstituted TVP into the sauce and let it absorb as much of it as possible. It will look disgusting while it’s cooking. Don’t worry about it; the end product will be fine.
Split baked potatoes down the middle and top with the TVP mixture and, if desired, your favorite vegan sour cream substitute.
The TVP mixture also works as filling for wraps or sandwiches, but I like it best over baked potatoes.