Feline haiku

Here is a poem about Walter’s life, told from his perspective:

Big, gray mockingbird
Singing outside my window.
When can I eat him?

Here is a poem about Walter’s life, told from a human perspective:

Big, gray mockingbird
Defecates on my mailbox.
Please, Walter: Eat him.

I wish I had video of this bird. It spends all day long taunting Walter.

It starts out by sitting on top of the mailbox just outside Walter’s window, staring at him as if to say, “You want a piece of me?”

Walter stares back at the bird until it flies up to the corner of the porch roof and stares down at him for a while. Walter stands on his hind legs, stretches his paws up, and swats at the window while chattering frantically at the bird. I’m not sure what he’s saying, but I’m fairly confident that it involves the phrase “Get off my land,” along with several obscenities.

The bird continues to stare down at Walter for a little while and then flies to the tree a few feet away — still within Walter’s line of vision — and sits there until Walter loses interest, at which point the bird makes a great show of flying back to the porch or the mailbox to get his attention again.

I’ve seen this go on for a good 15 minutes at a time. It’s hilarious.