Kindred tastes, motives, and aspirations are necessary to the formation of a happy and permanent companionship. The beautiful in character is also the good, welding indissolubly the links of affection.
— Mary Baker Eddy
One doesn’t normally think of claymation, big rigs, and parodies of Red Sovine songs as being the stuff romantic moments are made of … but believe it or not, the Large Marge scene from Pee-Wee’s Big Adventure figures prominently into what I consider one of the defining moments of my marriage.
I realize this sounds asinine, but bear with me.
Mrs. Eddy talks about “kindred tastes, motives, and aspirations” — what we might refer to as common ground — being “necessary to the formation of a happy and permanent companionship.” In my experience, that concept is most apparent in what I refer to as “Large Marge Moments.”
Shortly after Ron and I got married, we decided to watch Pee-Wee’s Big Adventure together. Neither of us had seen the film in years, but when Large Marge appeared on the screen, we both began spontaneously reciting the entire scene, verbatim, along with her.
Obviously we are hopeless dorks … but there was nothing dorky about the love I felt for Ron as we shared a hearty laugh at our discovery of yet another “kindred taste” (or lack thereof, as the case may be).
Large Marge Moments aren’t the starry-eyed, bells-and-whistles, forget-to-breathe-as-a-little-shiver-runs-up-your-spine moments that fill the pages of romance novels.
In fact, Large Marge Moments frequently look pretty dorky. But I think they’re absolutely critical to the success of a marriage. Romance can’t survive on infatuation alone. It has to be underpinned with genuine affection and solid friendship — qualities that often surface in uninhibited, joyful, exuberant moments full of hysterical laughter and unbridled goofiness.
Large Marge moments are the best-friend moments in which you discover each other’s weird little quirks and love each other not in spite of them, but because of them. They’re moments of sweet, easy, sometimes silly intimacy that fits as comfortably and naturally as a pair of well-worn Birkenstocks.
Cherish the Large Marge moments. They’re the ones that “[weld] indissolubly the links of affection” that will pull you safely from any “twisted, burning wreck” moments that come your way.
Yes, sir. Those are the best … moments … I ever seen.